Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers

Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Up and Down

It's been a pretty good day.
Church this morning,
playing with Monkey.
Super-Cleaning Day -
moved all the furniture and vacuumed blinds 
kinda cleaning. 

But in the back of my mind, 
it's a hard day.

This week, we were given an option from Lifetime
that would involve another attorney/agency.
The whole thing felt kind of unethical,
but it didn't work out anyway.
It would have cost nearly $12K more.


So...we froze our contract.
Technically we can do this for up to nine months,
pay a reactivation fee (crappy, IMO)
and go back active.
If we move during this nine months, 
we might be able to complete our contract.

It's hard, knowing that for now,
it's over.
There is no chance for us to adopt at this time.
It's heartbreaking.
To know that we were so close,
having held a baby in our arms 
and walked away.
That was my worst fear,
and it came true. 
To know that we almost made it again.
And now it's done. 

I hope that we are able to recoup financially,
and able to pursue adoption.
I hate that it has cost us SO much,
and not just monetarily.
It's a terrible roller coaster.
It would have been totally worth it,
if it ended happily.
But it hasn't. 

It makes me wonder if we should have just 
poured all this money into fertility treatment.


  1. UGH. Lifetime. From a birth mom perspective if I'd seen this sooner I would have told you to run as far as possible from them. I'm sorry things haven't worked out for you so far. I hope things get better. - Fellow Redditor

    1. I just saw this comment, because I am a slacker about checking them. :) Once we get straightened out, I am not sure if we should go back and finish our contract with them or not.
      Were they not helpful with expectant moms either?