For the most part,
I would say that I feel ok.
Our family, friends, and church family have been incredibly supportive.
I harbor no ill will for R.
I can understand her choices.
Though I do admit that I don't feel much invested in everything right now.
Don't really care.
I could use more Monkey snuggles,
but he's a big boy now and doesn't share them as freely.
I just don't know what to do about the things.
The car seat and cradle we borrowed,
they are easily returned.
But first I have to take the seat out of our car.
I have to face the cradle in the bedroom.
A good chunk of the clothes were borrowed,
so they can go back.
But some of it wasn't.
We got the call about 12 hours before she was born
that the dresser we ordered is ready for pick up.
The lovely gifts we got at our shower.
All the things I knit.
All the diapers that I have bought.
The new yarn that I just ordered the day before we left.
I have to face those things.
And that is the easy part,
because they aren't directly tied to her.
There are pictures.
Quite a few of them.
Baby & Monkey.
Baby & Kevin.
Baby & R.
The outfit she wore
and spilled formula on.
The hospital bracelet.
What do I do with these things?
We contacted Lifetime today, just to check in.
After being assured by R that she would call them,
just so they would know that she is doing alright,
However, that doesn't really affect us,
I just worry for her.
And care about her.
Anyway, we've decided to update our adoption profiles.
They're a year and a half old now.
A few little things have changed.
Update pictures and colors and layout.
We want to go back "active."
Hopefully there is something in store for us.